When we got married, I first tried to get Andrea to go along with the Dave Ramsey plan. She was ready to stop being a college student and spend the money she worked so hard to earn. I had been paying down debt while I was waiting to get married so I was not on board with going further into debt.
I tried to push her to start paying off debt but we had to buy a house and all the furnishings that go with it. She did not like my plan.
We had a lot of debt from school and from our wedding (on credit cards) and we were saving to buy a bedroom set. Then her transmission went out. We had to spend all the saved money on replacing her transmission. She was so upset and we even fought a little (I was yelled at for not being upset enough).
When things calmed down a bit I said something along the lines of “I wish we had an emergency fund for this, then it wouldn’t be such a big deal”. My goal was to plant the seed in the fertile ground of her mind. I know it was a little manipulative but from that day on she started picking up momentum to get out of debt.
Now she lives being out of debt and is always telling her coworkers about it and how to do it.
So I learned to begin planing seeds of ideas in her head way in the future of when I want to take action on something.
This is a great illustration of focusing on being effective first, and delivering your message second. Rather than tell her what to do, you helped her reach the conclusion on her own. That’s leadership. Nice job man.
I learned that method works the hard way